…personal development for smart professionals
productivity
Shut Up and Listen!
126 days
Dale Carnegie once said “When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.” Sounds negative, yes, sometimes the truth doesn’t tickle the ears and sound pretty but truer words were never spoken.
The sooner you are able to get out of your head and leave behind your preferences, desires and ways of doing things the better off you’ll be. Getting into the heads of others and looking at things they way they do is the most important thing you can learn to do. Sales people, at least the good ones, recognize this and usually make an attempt to understand potential customers before trying to sell them something. -And yes, it’s possible to overdo that by getting overly friendly and familiar with your subjects.
I think its important for everyone to engage in this practice. It doesn’t matter with whom you are dealing, a solid understanding of what motivates others and careful assimilation of those factors into your interactions is the most important thing you can do to ensure productive human relations.
I don’t care that you have one blue thingie left and you sell it to me at a deep discount. I hate blue and it reminds me of my ex-wife. If you had taken the time to learn about my preferences you’d know that. How do you learn about my preferences and worldview? Ask a few questions then SHUT UP and let me talk. Most people enjoy talking about themselves, their accomplishments and their worldview. Problem is, you are I share that fondness for talking about ourselves and always find ways to work ourselves back into the spotlight. In the meantime, while you’re mind is busy thinking of what to say next, you miss key elements of what I’m saying.
Your customer doesn’t care that you’ve had a hard day and you’re short staffed and nobody knows how hard you work…bla bla bla. Oh sure, maybe your momma cares, and your therapist -as long as you pay your therapy bill but for the most part, customers what what they want, when they want it, for the reasons they want it and as conveniently as possible.
The most successful people in the world are those who can set aside the human tendency to focus on ourselves to the detriment of missing what other people are saying, thinking and feeling. You and I prefer to do business with companies and individuals who obsess about my needs, desires and worldview. Showing me you understand me starts with actually understanding me then addressing my needs as if you’d rather serve me than breathe. I’m sick of businesses and professionals that think “build it and they will come” is enough. I’m not alone when I stand up and demand “IMPRESS ME”. Trust me, if you’re little local shoe store doesn’t carry the extra wide shoes I need, I’ll sit at home and order from zappos.com. You can whine and moan all day but you’ve left me with no options. The internet and a handful of merchants who obsess over customer service are making survival more difficult for local merchants who worship at the altar of mediocrity.
Mr. Carnegie’s advise can and should be applied broadly. It doesn’t matter if we’re talking about relations with customers, colleagues, family members, friends or lovers; focusing your attention of the ‘other’ person as if the world revolved around them is the easiest way to influence them. Your attempts to genuinely understand the worldview of any human being you encounter will be rewarded with better relationships. It doesn’t matter if you are trying to sell me a pair of shoes or trying to convince me to mow the yard; the secret to influencing another human being begins with setting aside your worldview and adopting mine.
5 Things to do more of -RIGHT NOW!
181 days
1. Tell someone in your work/professional environment that you really appreciate their contribution to the success of your business or organization.
2. Turn off your phone next time you’re with a close friend. Close friendships are more valuable than almost any potential interruption. If the world comes to an end, you’ll know about it as soon as you turn your phone back on -in fact, you’ll have a more supportive friend to help you cope.
3. Stop, smile, then say “Thank you” next time a store clerk helps you locate something.
4. Realize this, you’re not nearly as smart as you think you are. Sometimes people whom you least expect can teach you something. ASK for help and other opinions/viewpoints.
5. Shut up, listen then think. Resist the temptation to begin formulating your verbal response before the other person is finished speaking. When words have stopped coming out of the other person’s mouth, THEN decide what to say in response.
BONUS:
Breathe! You’re probably already doing that one but taking time out several times per day to quietly observe 5 in and out breath cycles will work wonders to clear your mind. A clear mind equals a more efficient mind.
How to Quit like a Winner
0312 days
Vince Lombardi was wrong. ”Winners never quit and quitters never win” is a crock!
In reality, winners quit all the time. They just quit the “right” things to quit. They quit doing things that don’t adequately contribute to success.
Right now, there are several things you should quit doing because those things aren’t productive and never will be.
For example, a massage therapist who tries to market his or her services to the general population is wasting time, money, and energy. You know as well as I do, some people will NEVER darken the doorsteps of the office of a massage therapist -its just too “fu-fu.” If you really want a winning marketing strategy, target the people who are most likely to be in the market for a massage or at least open to the idea.
The real estate agent who thinks advertising in the yellow pages and the Sunday paper is ‘enough’, clearly needs to quit playing by yesterday’s rules and innovate new ways of connecting with potential buyers and sellers.
Here are just a few things you should quit doing immediately:
- Quit waiting for approval! You don’t need approval or encouragement from other people to do what you know in your gut is right, just do it!
- Quit wasting money on advertising if it isn’t working. “Just getting your name out there” is pointless if the ad doesn’t get paying customers through the door.
- Quit looking at your competition. Innovate and start providing that “extra touch” none of your competitors have thought of yet.
- Quit waiting for things to be “just right” before you launch that new project. You don’t have to get it perfect; just get it going!
Now that we’ve established that you need to be a quitter (sometimes); let me give you my list of things you should NEVER quit doing:
- Never stop asking yourself “how can I make my products and services better?”
- Never assume that because you are the market leader today that “business as usual” will keep you in the lead.
- Never assume you can’t learn things from other industries and adapt them to your business.
- Never stop learning. The practice of constantly learning new things is not just good for your business and professional development; it keeps your brain agile and healthy.
Persistence is only helpful if it is applied to the “right” things. If you’re on a train going the wrong way, persistence is not a good thing.
The Secret to Time Management
0355 days
If you grew up in America, you were probably indoctrinated about the value of working hard. Out of the Protestant work ethic grew a belief system that values hard work so much so that when there isn’t hard work to be done, we do things to ‘appear’ to be working hard. In fact, we feel guilty if we don’t at least ‘look busy’ even if we aren’t. That drive to work hard causes us to overlook the fact that, most of the time we can work smarter and thereby not have to work harder. Unfortunately, people tend to value working hard over working smart. We almost feel guilty when we take shortcuts because it is so engrained in our collective consciousness that working hard is the right thing to do. In our culture, we have this limiting belief that working harder is better than working smarter and faster.
Parkinson’s Law is an adage first articulated by C. Northcote Parkinson in an essay published in The Economist in 1955: “Work expands to fill the time available for it’s completion” was Mr. Parkinson’s observation.
Parkinson’s Law simply means that if you give yourself a week to complete a five hour task, then (psychologically speaking) that task will increase in complexity and become more complicated so as to fill the entire week allocated for it’s completion.
Ever been called by your supervisor and reminded that tomorrow is a deadline for a project you had forgotten? What happened, you hustled and finished the project in six hours even though you had the last month allocated to the project.
How about a phone call from your mother-in-law; she’s on her way to your house and will be there in 30 minutes. You spring into action, quickly straightening the house, and presto! In a mere 25 minutes your house is as presentable as if you’d spent the afternoon cleaning -just hope she does’t look under your bed.
I am NOT advocating putting things off until the last minute. I am just suggesting that perhaps most projects can be completed in much less time than we tend to lead ourselves and other to believe. Use that knowledge to your advantage by cutting the time you allocate to a given project by half.
Personal Achievement
0362 days
by Lee
in productivity
The United States Declaration of Independence proclaims that we all have the inalienable right to “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” Yet, for many people, the pursuit of happiness is illusive. Given the broad application of the Pareto Principle, it should come as no surprise that 80% of our perceived happiness derives from a mere 20% of our activities.
I believe it is also true that 80% of what holds you back is just an illusion. Self-doubt, self-sabotage, and other limiting beliefs hinders our achievement more than anything exterior to yourselves. Only a small percent of what holds us back is ‘real’, and in many cases, those things can be addressed and their effect minimized.
Sometimes spending less time with people and activities that annoy or emotionally drain us and more time with people and activities we truly enjoy can make an enormous difference in our energy level. It’s amazing what you can get accomplished when you are engaged in an activity we enjoy. Ever notice how much more efficient you are when you are busy doing something you enjoy at your deepest level? Only when you are engaged in activities and relationships that allow full expression of your authentic self are you operating in the zone. Finding relationships, careers, or activities that allow that expression puts you in a position enjoyed by few people; yet, it is within the reach of nearly everyone I’ve ever met.
